So, I teased this a couple of weeks ago, but now I'm ready to reveal a little bit. I'm creating an Anonymous Law Firm website, designed to be a parody of real law firm websites, entertaining in its own right, and if it happens to drive a couple of book sales, even better. I spent a couple of hours this afternoon with the web designer and we mapped out the site structure and some of the templates. It's going to be cool, I'm really excited. I mean, I still have to write all the content. But besides that, it's really cool. Like on most real law firm web sites, I'm hoping to have some appropriate photos sprinkled in. Real law firms tend to focus on generic business images. Cityscapes. Bridges. Gleaming hallways. Open roads. Smiling associates. Smiling, racially diverse associates. Tall buildings. White columns.
I think I can do funnier than that. Well, I think I can do funnier than that, if I could sneak into some offices and take some pictures. Dead plants. Dirty bathroom stalls. Stacks and stacks of paper. Empty conference rooms. Dispiriting views out the window. Sleeping receptionists. Filthy break room refrigerators. Empty whiskey bottles sticking out of desk drawers. Coffee spills. Muffin crumbs. People on window ledges. People on curbs that cropped properly, and maybe with some help from photoshop, look like people on window ledges. Handcuffs. Shackles. Ropes hanging from the ceiling, a kicked-out chair underneath. BlackBerries. Family photos behind cracked glass. Tears. Documents marked up with red pen. Trash cans on fire. I'm just trying to think of things on the fly here, I'm sure lots of you could do even better.
So here's my reader challenge, to anyone with a digital camera who wants to help. You see what I'm going for here. Subversive photos for a law firm website. I'm not asking for anything identifiable to you or your office; I'm not actually trying to uncover real horrors. Staged horrors in generic-looking settings are just fine. You send me a photo to use, I'll find a way to get you an Anonymous Lawyer stress ball, or some other sort of Anonymous Lawyer swag my publisher will give me, even if I have to bear the cost, since it's surely a worthwhile investment.
The second piece of this is even easier. I'm hoping to create a fairly robust set of attorney profiles, with headshot. You can be an anonymous lawyer, if you want. Just send me a headshot, preferably looking tired and unkempt, however you think you can best express the vision I've got of an over-the-top site that parodies the real ones. You can even name yourself, if you like, although I'm happy to come up with something. I may also be inclined to have you fill out a brief questionnaire, only if you'd like, and you can have your own complete fake attorney biography on the site.
Sound like fun? Eh, even if doesn't sell any books, it's an attempt to do something fun and different and play around with the Internet a bit. A lot more interesting than a static book promotion site, at the very least.
Throw your photos to my gmail account. Thanks in advance for the help.