Cats are like law firm partners.
Dogs are like law firm associates.
Think about it.
Cats only want you around when they need something. They're moody, unpredictable, and will sometimes scratch you for no reason. They're mean. And just like law firm partners, they like to rub up against things that are powerless to stop them, like scratching posts, or paralegals.
Dogs love you. They follow you around and beg for attention. They want to be noticed. They want to be your favorite dog in the entire firm. They don't always know what they're doing, but they usually give it their best shot, although sometimes ask too many questions. No matter how many times you throw the frisbee, they always come back for more. They love table scraps, and meaningless praise. And just like law firm associates, they sometimes like to eat their own poop.
I stand by this post.