Suppose you tell someone they're invited to your wedding, and they say they wish they could come but they already have another wedding that day, and so they can't.
Suppose you tell someone they're invited to your wedding, and they say they wish they could come but they already have another wedding that day, and so they can't.
September 18, 2008 at 06:33 PM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (14)
Saw this today, handwritten sign on a lamppost:
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My name is Jay. I am 6 feet 4 inches tall. I am looking for help selling two books I wrote.
[Phone number]
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Still wondering why his height is relevant.
July 22, 2008 at 10:03 PM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (4)
I'm writing a scene right now that involves a ghost. And right as I'm writing the ghost's only line of dialogue, I press the CTRL key to underline the words -- and it pops off the keyboard. Ghosts are inside my laptop. I think I've been able to re-attach it, although it feels not-quite-attached. At least it's pretty much the least important key there is. On my previous laptop, a couple months before it was put out to pasture, the letters started popping off. Maybe it's the way I type. Although that one was 5 years old, this one's barely a year. So it seems way too early for my keyboard to start getting destroyed.
I don't know how to type, incidentally. I hunt and peck. Quickly, but with my 2 pointer fingers and that's pretty much it.
July 14, 2008 at 11:52 PM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (1)
I added a few more books I've read to the sidebar, including Clay Shirky's excellent "Here Comes Everybody," a primer on how the Internet has enabled people to meet, interact, and organize collective action in ways we never before could, not just through sites like Meet Up but through mass e-mails, social networking sites, message boards, Twitter, IRC, and more. He opens with a story about a girl who lost her cell phone, and the person who found it refused to return it. In the "old" days, nothing could really be done. But her friend started a website and people forwarded it around and a whole community emerged -- police officers who knew how to navigate the system and get the police to take action when they otherwise wouldn't, people who knew the girl who refused to give back the phone, etc. And they got the phone back. It's a cool read. And the Jennifer 8. Lee book, "The Fortune Cookie Chronicles," is also an excellent read -- it's a history of American Chinese food, sort of -- stories about the start of the fortune cookie, about how no one in China would recognize General Tso's Chicken as Chinese food at all, about the American invention of Chop Suey, and a lot more. Lee went to my high school, but was a couple of years ahead of me and I didn't know her. I like her articles for the Times. Her book is worth checking out.
I just went to the library to give the books back and pick up the book I have on hold that just came in. Most of the people who work at my local library here seem perfectly nice, but there's one woman who just kind of confuses me with her tone. I imagine she means nothing by it, and thinks she's being friendly, but she makes me wish I knew what her hours were, so I could try and avoid her. She makes me feel bad about using the library, and I don't know why. I admit, I'm a heavy library user. I use the reserve system to its fullest extent -- you're allowed to place holds on up to 30 books, and they come in for pickup when you're next in line. Because there are often 40 or 50 people with holds on a book, and there might only be 6 or 7 copies in the system, it can take a few months to get some books. And so sometimes I'll return books and there'll be one or two books waiting for pickup, and occasionally I'll have 6 or 7. Last time this woman was there and I picked up books, I think there were 6 books waiting for me, and she made a comment about how they had to put them on the side because they were taking up so much shelf space. Which is fine, but the way she said it made me feel like she was somehow accusing me of doing something wrong. I'm not. I'm using their library system. She should be happy about that, since if no one did, she'd probably be out of job. But somehow her tone made me feel bad about reading. Congratulations. So today there was only one book waiting for me. I told her I think I have one book on reserve. "Only one book? For you? That can't be possible," she said. And she checked the system. "Amazing! One book. Two more on the way. (beat) And twenty-seven more still in the system." With a really snarky tone, like I'm a criminal, trying to steal books. I didn't invent the system. I'm merely using it. I'm writing about this not because I'm actually annoyed, but I'm confused -- what am I doing to make her annoyed? Why does she work for the library if she hates people who use it?
July 07, 2008 at 11:08 PM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (6)
My mom and I went into a stationary store to buy stamps this afternoon (I'm in NY the rest of this week -- going to a friend's wedding this weekend). "Oh, we're all sold out. A whole bunch of people came in and stocked up for the holiday." And we nodded and left... before realizing... wait a second, what are they talking about? Are people lighting stamps on fire? Mailing fireworks to each other? What is it about July 4th that requires stamps, in any way?
I saw my grandma this morning, for the first time since she moved back home and got the full-time aide -- I've been back in LA since the day before she got out of the rehab facility she was in for a couple of weeks post-hospital. I walked in and she leaped up and said, "we're going somewhere!" And I asked where we were going, and she started coming down the steps and said, "you'll see when we get outside." And so we get outside, and she whispered, "I don't care where we go, I just wanted to get out of the house and away from the aide for a little while! I'm not used to this, it's like I'm a baby, someone hovering over me all day!" And so we drove around the neighborhood for a few minutes and parked under a shady tree and just talked for about an hour and a half before I brought her back home. She's doing reasonably well in a lot of ways -- she's walking okay, she's talking without any problems, she's mentally sharp at least to an observer -- but she's frustrated because she can tell there's still some problems with her brain, her reading still hasn't come back (although she can sound things out, slowly, if she really makes the effort, and she can spell aloud if you ask her to spell something), and sometimes the TV is just a little too fast for her to get everything. She went to the senior center yesterday for the first time since the stroke, hoping it would be like things were back to normal, but she felt uncomfortable being there with the aide, and she didn't feel like she could really contribute to the class discussion -- it was her poetry class, I think -- she hadn't been able to write a poem, and things were moving a little too quick for her to really feel like she was getting anything out of it. And she's embarrassed to have all her friends, who know she had a stroke, acting differently around her and in some ways treating her like she's a sick person, but at the same time not really being able to tell anything is wrong with her because she's talking fine, and so they expect she'll be the same as she was, and she feels like she isn't... and so she said she really didn't have a very good time. She's going to see a geriatric psychiatrist next week, and she's looking forward to the appointment, because she wants to talk to people who understand what she's going through. We're trying to find her a stroke support group in the area, even though my mom is worried it'll depress my grandma since most of the people there will probably be in worse shape than she is. But even if they are, I think that might actually (sadly) help her feel better as she sees that she has a lot of capabilities that other people in her situation don't. In any case, I think she's doing okay all things considered -- she's still pretty down about the whole thing, and bored sitting in the house all day, and doesn't like having to have an aide with her wherever she goes (and I've been encouraging my mom to go over there and take her for little trips without the aide, to give both of them a break from each other), and hasn't found a new routine yet (I suggested maybe volunteering at an animal shelter, but she didn't seem too excited about that idea), but I think she's slowly improving and feeling like she's doing ok overall.
July 02, 2008 at 04:35 PM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (2)
I'm in an airport, between flights en route from LA to NY (free wireless in the Las Vegas airport (!), if anyone's curious). I just got this e-mail:
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Subject: more info on annonymous law firm
I found your website by accident while surfing the web on legal matters. My fiance (who is a lawyer) and myself and in the preliminary stages of starting a unique legal website business site called [ ]. It wd be great if someone from your firm can call me and tell me fore about it, and also I have some specific questions regarding your consultation procedures. My number is [ ] (mountain time zone). Looking forward to hearing from you.
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Seriously?
Anyway... TV recommendation for tonight... Wipeout and I Survived a Japanese Game Show, both on ABC. I saw the premieres last week and while I'm not sure I thought they were *good* shows, they were both *interesting* shows, and at least make me think someone at ABC is trying. Wipeout is a mean-spirited game show where people get hit by things and fall down, and the hosts make fun of them even when it seems like they need medical attention. I Survived a Japanese Game Show is a game show / reality show hybrid where they take a bunch of people to Japan, make them compete in a fake Japanese game show, and eliminate one each week. The fun part is getting to see a little bit of Japan on TV. The not fun part are the contestants. Each show worth giving a chance, I think, although I don't know if they're worth any more than that.
July 01, 2008 at 03:44 PM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (3)
Can't believe George Carlin just died. I am mostly oblivious to any celebrities I may or may not pass on street out here, but just last month George Carlin was in front of me on line in Whole Foods. He was buying a gallon of skim milk and a dozen organic eggs. I didn't notice him at first, but the cashier said hi, and he said hello back, and I instantly recognized the voice and turned to look. He paid with a hundred-dollar bill, and while the cashier went off to get change from her manager, there were a good thirty seconds where we were both standing there, and I so wanted to say something -- like, "I'm a huge fan," or, I don't know, something like that -- but I was too shy. And then she gave him his change.
June 23, 2008 at 02:36 AM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (2)
I just bought toothpaste -- there was a version of Crest on sale, and I'm a little confused by it. It's called Crest Pro-Health Night. I don't know what could possibly make a toothpaste specially formulated for the nighttime, as opposed to the daytime. And, in fact, the side of the box says, "Effective day or night, Crest Pro-Health Night is formulated with a unique nighttime flavor." It's a relief that it's effective day or night, since I wouldn't want to have to buy two different toothpastes depending on the time of day I'm brushing. But what exactly is the flavor of nighttime? As far as I can tell, it's mint. And in fact the name of the flavor, on the box, is "Clean Night Mint." Again, I don't really know what the flavor of nighttime is. Why does this product exist? I understand why there's Tylenol Cold day and night -- one makes you sleepy, one does not. But will this toothpaste make me sleepy? I hope it won't. I don't really understand the marketing reasons behind this product. And maybe no one did, and that's why it was on sale.
Coming soon: Charmin Morning. For those morning kinds of, well, you know.
June 17, 2008 at 07:45 PM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (1)
I'm very excited to share the news that my girlfriend and I got engaged this afternoon -- she's been a little blog-shy, hence the lack of much talk about her on here, but I'm sure she won't mind me saying that she's absolutely terrific -- kind, passionate, decent, I have nothing but good adjectives I could use to describe her. She's finishing up her third year of medical school and planning to become a geriatrician -- which has made her especially helpful with all this grandma stuff, of course. Our two-year anniversary is Monday, and we'd been talking about this stuff for a while, and so she was expecting the proposal then, but I jumped the gun by a few days. Figured I'd be nervous all weekend and give the plan away if I'd waited. Plus I found myself pretty much unable to feel comfortable having an engagement ring in my pocket, for fear of robbers with x-ray vision coming to get me. I can't imagine anyone I'd rather build a life with, and spend a life with. She will likely continue to be blog-shy, and in all honesty, most of us with blogs -- and I'm putting myself at the top of that list -- could probably stand to be a little more blog-shy ourselves.
May 23, 2008 at 11:08 PM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (21)
I am relieved to be able to say that I'm pretty sure my next post won't need to be about my grandma, because things have stabilized to a point where I'm starting to resume thinking about and doing other things in addition to worrying about this stuff, which is good. The last couple of days have shown real progress -- her reading and writing are starting to come back a little bit, she's seeming more and more like herself, and she'll probably be moved to an inpatient physical therapy setting in the next couple of days, with the plan right now looking like she'll end up being functional enough to go back home, although she'll probably need a full-time nurse/aide with her, at least for now. But she's up and walking, her appetite's been good, she's talking to friends on the phone, and to someone who doesn't know her that well, she can probably pass for someone who didn't just have a stroke last week -- which, for someone her age, makes her pretty darn lucky. She continues to be extremely self-aware about what's going on, and very good about articulating how her brain is working -- which has made this all, if I take a bit of a detached perspective, pretty fascinating from an intellectual perspective. Basically, when she's in control of the conversation, and she can pick her words, any deficits are pretty much imperceptible -- but when asked for the name of an object, or a specific question that requires an instant answer, she can't retrieve the word. I was telling her, actually, I feel like I know just what she means, because it doesn't sound terribly dissimilar in some ways to when I stutter -- I've written about this before -- but basically, normal conversation or when I'm fully comfortable I'm completely fluent, but when there's pressure on saying a specific word at a specific time, when I can't work around it, when I'm locked into the word choice, then I'll sometimes freeze up on it and I can't get the word out right away. So, for her it's a different place in the pathway -- it's the brain not being able to access the word instead of just the voice not being able to spit it out -- but it's sort of the same thing in practice. She's also been very zen about all of this happening -- on one level it's a bit of a mystery to her how it could all have happened so quickly, her brain working perfectly fine last Tuesday morning, and then by the evening she was in the hospital, but on another level as she's gotten back to herself she's started to talk about how she's realizing the scope of the impact, what she can and can't do, and she can deal with it -- she can still do a lot of things, she can still live an active life, she can still have meaningful relationships. So if she can't take the bus on her own, so if she can't see as clearly as before -- the right side of her field of vision has definitely been affected although it's not completely obvious yet to what extent -- so if she can't remember everything she wants to say as quickly as she could before, she understands, she's 92 years old, and she can adjust. Which is a big change from the morning after the stroke, when she wished the whole thing had just taken her life completely. But today she was like, "Okay, so I'll get out of here in the next few days, I'll go to physical therapy, and then when I go home, we can hire a nurse and I'll find a new routine." She's had a couple of one-on-one nurses in the hospital, and she likes one of them very much -- and this nurse has said she'd be interested in private care once my grandma goes home, if we're interested in her -- and so that may work itself out pretty easily. They're getting along well, she enjoys talking to my grandma, my grandma enjoys talking to her and finds her "unusually competent" (her words :), so it seems like it may be a good match.
Pointless digression -- It strikes me -- never, ever having thought about this before -- that finding a home health aide is probably a lot like finding a nanny -- you need to match personality, find someone who the "patient" likes and will listen to, and at the same time there's some sense of loss, in that this person will become a bigger part of the child's life or the elder's life than you'd ideally want a stranger to be -- yet it becomes the best option when no one can really devote themselves to full-time care. That said, I suppose the stigma -- and not being in that situation, I can't possibly pass judgment on whether it's a rightful stigma or not -- that comes with having a nanny raise your children doesn't really come into play when it's an aide helping care for a grandmother.
In any case, for now a bit of a sigh of relief, as she seems to be stable and getting better and I can blog about tonight's episode of Top Chef with a clear head, and return to feeling guilty about lack of progress on a law school pilot script I've been playing around with, and that I have an awesome outline for, that I'm really happy with, but yet for whatever reason I can't get myself excited to write.
May 21, 2008 at 07:22 PM in Just Stuff I'm Thinking About | Permalink | Comments (2)
Jason Epstein: Book Business: Publishing Past, Present, and Future
Michael Chabon: Manhood for Amateurs: The Pleasures and Regrets of a Husband, Father, and Son
Bill Wasik: And Then There's This: How Stories Live and Die in Viral Culture
Matthew Stewart: The Management Myth: Why the "Experts" Keep Getting it Wrong
Erik Qualman: Socialnomics: How social media transforms the way we live and do business
Vivian Gornick: The Situation and the Story: The Art of Personal Narrative
